America Sucks Less

      E
This country’s sure got problems
    A                   E
Corruption, crime, and drugs.
     E
And though we try to fix the world
     B
The world just hates our guts.
         E
But for all our woes and troubles
A                 E
I still love the US
          E
‘Cause compared to the rest of the world
  B            E
America sucks less


[Verse 2]

      E
They call us all polluters
          A       E
With our Hummer SUV’s
        E
But in China you can taste the air
        B
And it tastes like iPhone 3’s
         E
You may hate our politicians
     A                E
And protest what they say
     E
But think about how much it sucks
   B              E
To be Russian and gay


[Verse 3]

      E
Our congress can’t do anything
     A            E
Our senators are goons
        E
But at least they were elected
          B
And their name’s not Kim Jong–un
    E
Japan makes better cars than us
 A                 E
Games and cartoon shows
       E
But I saw The Cove on Netflix huh
B                              E
And that was pretty fucked up, bros


[Chorus]

      A         E              B        E
America, I love you, out of necessity
         A               E
You’re not too hot and not too cold
     B
And mostly not diseased
    A            E
Compared to the alternative
        B           C#m
You’re probably the best
            A           E
‘Cause the whole world sucks
     B                  E
But America sure sucks less


[Verse 4]

      E
Our economy is tanking
           A                E
But we’re not as fucked as Greece
     E
Our fast food is disgusting
      B
But Italians eat maggot cheese
    E
The NSA is spying on
    A                E
Our emails and phone calls
    E
But good luck finding WiFi
        B            E
In some village in Nepal


[Verse 5]

   E
Brazil is full of riots
   A                E
Australia’s full of snakes
 E
Mexico’s got cartels
           B
And their water makes you shit for days
  E
Dubai is just Las Vegas
        A          E
Without alcohol or fun
    E
And Africa’s in a post-colonial tailspin
    B                  E
Of genocide and oppression


[Chorus 2]

   A         E
America, I love you
                B               E
Though you’re run by old white men
   A
Republicans are assholes
         B
But at least they’re not the French
         A               E
We’d probably get a solid B
             B               C#m
If they gave the world a test
               A           E
‘Cause the whole world blows
         B                  B
But America sure blows less


[Chorus 3]

  B          F#
America, I love you
           C#            F#
For your lack of murder squads (lack of murder squads)
      B
Your working indoor plumbing
          C#
And your mostly valid laws
      B               F#
In a world of mostly shit
  C#                D#m
America stinks the best


[Outro]

            B           F#
‘Cause the whole world sucks
    C#                 F#
But America sure sucks less