Walmart Wasteland

BIGJ

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Walkin' through the doors, hear her screech like a banshee
Tweak freak draggin' a car, yellin' who stole my damn sheet?
Couple in aisle nine, havin' a lover's brawl
She threw a box of condoms at his big-ass cart
Old man scratchin' his balls by the deli meat
Lady sniffin' candles like she tryin' to catch a cheat
Dude in pajama pants, pissin' in the plants
And the kid yells mama he's doin' the pee-pee dance

At the Walmart Wasteland, crackers is on patrol
Zombies marchin' everywhere with no goddamn goal
After midnight, this bitch turns into Silent Hill
You ain't lived life till you seen a tweaker sit still
As the Walmart Wasteland, free score from the dark
I swear to bathroom demons, bark, bark
Every night's a circus, grab your popcorn, man
Welcome to Walmart Wasteland

Saw a granny lingerie screamin' where's the beer?
Saw a do-it-half-a-molly whisper, aliens are here
Fat dude ridin' scooters like it's Fast and Furious
Ran over a toddler and said, who left this little curiosity?
A woman stole deodorant, shoved it somewhere deep
When she walked by, it squeaked, holy motherfuckin' sheep
Homeless man battlin' pigeons in the parking lot
He shouted this is my kingdom, like he was Camelot

Ran into a lady with a mustache, stickin' in mine
She said: Hand me that pickle jaw, or I'll bust your spine
Dude in the electronic said: Wanna buy a TV?
But he didn't work here, he was high as fuck on PCP
In the bathroom stall, all I heard a moan and a thud
Over that bitch, someone bathin' in tomato sauce and blood
A Karen told the manager I'll shut this bitch down
Manager said: Do it, bitch, I don't get paid enough to frown
Why the fuck is that dude humpin' a rotisserie chicken?
Why that lady smackin' the mannequin's asses
Why does someone keep fartin' in every aisle?
Man, this store need Jesus

Tweak with no teeth, tryna sell me moonshine
Said, take a sip, big fella, it'll fix your spine
Saw a toddler holdin' beer, yellin' turn up, hoe!
And a guy with one flip-flop screamin', that's my toe!
Employees runnin' like it's Black Friday in hell
And every loudspeaker call sounds like a death bell
I swear I saw a demon in the craft house I blinked
But it was just a woman with makeup that looked like ink
Grabbed my milk, grabbed my chips, grabbed my soul on the way
Sprinted out that bitch, but you know I'll be back the next day